You just don't know how hard it is for me to write this tonight. I am on a women's ministry team and we set up tonight for a brunch that we will be doing in the morning. I will be a host of a game show and we got to practice tonight during set up. Everything went wrong. I lost my note cards with all the questions on them, there was a power surge that blew out the projector, and the interruptions just kept on coming.
I don't FEEL like doing this tomorrow. I don't know what to expect or even if the projector will be working so that we can do it. After all that craziness, I came home and my kids just weren't listening. They ended up having mommy explode at them about disobedience and then go to bed.
So where do I go from here? Where do I pick up from? Obedience.....don't I struggle with that a lot where my walk with God is concerned? But he doesn't explode on me. He patiently waits for me to return to Him and he lovingly embraces me every time that I do. He also doesn't tell me to be obedient because I FEEL like it. He expects me to be obedient because I love Him.
"It is what it is" is a saying that I have seen on a lot of stuff lately. But really, it is what it is. I have a friend that was just talking to me about circumstances this week. I had this cute saying on my blog a few days ago about not letting your circumstances define you and how you FEEL. Then she said that she was challenged in her devotionals to be content in whatever circumstances she was faced with. She followed that up by sharing how it's really about the heart and not the circumstances at all.
Well, I am not going to dwell on my circumstances. I am not going to sweat the details. I am going to trust God to work it all out and bless all the effort that is being put forth. I hope that I don't ever stop trying to be better. I hope that I always strive to do my best. But I also hope to continue to be molded into a person that can accept what is going on around me and make the best out of it at all times.
Yes....I will be kissing my babies again before I go to bed tonight and I do thank God that they won't remember every time their mom failed. And yes....I will be there tomorrow with a renewed sense of the love that I have for these women and why I do it to begin with. And yes.....I would love your prayers. Not for me, but for the women whom God is preparing for such a time as this tomorrow morning.
Fall is here!
4 years ago